Wheelchair Dilemmas

My grandmother gave me this book on manners because apparently I needed help in that area. I was reading it and there is an advice column at the end of every chapter, there is one letter that stuck out to me...

"Dear Alex,

I use a wheelchair. You wont believe how many times total strangers just start pushing me. How do I tell them I don't need their help?"

Oh my God, seriously!? If I was in a wheelchair I would carry around a tazer with me everywhere. So when jerk offs start "helping" me I can reach around ant taze their stupid asses. If someone were to just randomly start pushing me I would flip out, Id be like "WTF do you think your doing you stupid MF, Leave me the hell alone!" And thats how I would politely deal with that situation. :)

Another Addition To My Reputation Of Lies

This is my guitar (right) and my base (left). I barely knoe how to play either of them so they just chill in my room like that basicly all the time. I keep them there partly because I play them sometimes but mostly because I love the look on my friends faces when they walk into my room and say "Man thats so sick that you know how to play" Then of corse I have to make up some reason as to why I can play something for them right then. Theyre just another wonderful addition to my fake reputation. Soooooooooooooooo lame, i know.

Some of My Childhood Art

I don't really know what possessed me to draw this. I remember one time in second grade, I got detention for pushing this fat kid out of a swing but other than that this is completely random.

I have only been cheated on once, this was drawn two years before that though. It hurt but this form of punishment is a little extreme. Don't you just love my drawing skills, they're amazing aren't they? Anyway I was a very violent child. haha.

This was sixth grade, we had just gotten a new band teacher named Mr. Norem. Everyone hated him, in this picture he is stealing the social lives of the students as they walk through the door, that first one is me, hahahahaha. We ended up making him cry twice and he quit, we were wonderful students.

I was kind of frightened when I found this one in my old math notebook. This is such a depressing picture, The dude is about to be hung/stabbed to death and his chick is going to get shot trying to save him. I'm trying to figure out how the bad guys loose, I mean they have guns and pointy things, what do the good guys have? nothing is what they have. And on top of all of this its raining, how genius am I? Uh... allot. haha.