A Life Of Silent Pain

My motto is to suffer in silence when possible. There are a few exceptions to this motto, the lucky people in my life who get to hear all my complaining and so forth. But towards the rest of the world I am a strong seemingly fearless individual. I formed this motto at about the age of 10, I figured that nobody cared about my complaints or needs so I shared them with nobody. My physical, mental, and emotional pain was no concern of anyone but me. My motto stays the same but for different reasons with each passing year. Now I have a reputation to uphold, in the eyes of those around me I am mentaly strong, opinionated, and fearless person. While the opinionated part stays true on the inside the others are not as concreate. Mentaly strong... this is compleatly a lie, i am an extreamly emotional person and somewhat unstable. I dont need to be in an institute or anything im just a very fragile person, this topic is a whole post in itself so ill hold off on further explaining it. Fearless... this is also a compleate lie. First of all because I dont believe that any human being is fearless, secondly because I am one of the most paranoid people you will ever meet if you ever happen to meet me. In every situtation my mind runs through all the possibilities, picks the absolute worst, and applies it. I live in constant fear but express it to nobody in fear of what they will think of me. My life is one of constant fear and silent pain.